Stay away from fools, for you won’t find knowledge on their lips. (Proverbs 14:7)
So much for analysis. It’s time for application. For the sake of space, I will limit my comments here to a major heartache—being married to a fool. Some people are living with a marriage partner who has turned out to be totally different from the person they thought they married. And now they realise they’ve got a fool on their hands. Well-meaning friends and spiritual leaders may give all kinds of advice or teaching, but nothing works.
If there is continued folly, isolation is the most effective treatment. I wouldn’t dare make that statement without biblical support, because too many voices are saying something else these days. But according to Proverbs, if there is continued folly, the most effective treatment to employ is isolation.
Isn’t that insightful? Our thinking will break down if we stay in the presence of and try to do verbal battle with a fool. If we try to outsmart a fool, out trick a fool, outfight a fool, we will lose! We will lose clear thinking. We will begin to lack true knowledge. We will lose the discernment of understanding. “Leave the presence of a fool” is a command worth taking literally (Proverbs 14:7 NASB).
Of course, each situation must be considered independently. Great effort must be expended in prayer and counsel, and reconciliation attempts must be tried in every conceivable manner. But when all these fail and the foolish lifestyle is still evident, reason will no longer work.
Look again at Proverbs. “Excellent speech is not fitting for a fool, much less are lying lips to a prince” (17:7 NASB) and “Do not speak in the hearing of a fool, for he will despise the wisdom of your words” (23:9 NASB 1995).
I’ve met some fools who have been forced to live in the street. It’s remarkable how broken they can become. It’s encouraging how quickly God gets their attention. It’s amazing how much more committed they can be to a marriage when they have had to learn the hard lessons of loneliness and faced the struggle of having no place to live. I have seen God use isolation to bring people to their knees.
The church needs to hear the testimony of former fools more often—in waters of baptism, in adult fellowship classes, even on occasion in Sunday worship gatherings. A proclamation is in order when fools repent and are restored.
Even fools can come to an end of their godless folly. When they do—when repentance is obvious and authentic—forgiveness is the most Christlike, the most appropriate response. I close with the wise words of psychologist Archibald Hart, “Forgiveness is surrendering my right to hurt you for hurting me.”
